Tuesday, March 17, 2015

I am More




I'm more than the pain I daily endure.
I'm more than the words I write.
I'm more than the brave smile I show.
I'm more than the dreams I dare to believe.
I'm more than my past that I've overcome. 
I'm more than the men who hurt me, used me and abandoned me.
I'm more than the scars that prove God healed me from.
I'm more than the trails of tears I have tenderly and openly cried.
I'm more than the humble circumstances I live in.
I'm more than the lessons and wisdom I've gleaned.
I'm more than the worship songs I sing.
I'm more than my curvy body and all my womanly parts.
I'm more than my hopes and prayers you see deep in my eyes.
I'm more than the words I dare to speak.
I'm more than my battles and victories I've won.
I'm more than my insecurities and fears.
I'm more than my silence and quietness.
I'm more than my passion and sensuality.
I'm more than my strength's and even more so than my tenderness, frailties and weaknesses.
I'm more than what you see.
I'm more than these walls around my heart.
I am God's Daughter...
I am more....
~ Jenny Williams, A Modern Day Ruth , Copyright 2015

She Laid it on the Altar



She laid her heart's desire on the altar. She poured out her tears and disappointments onto His feet.
She let go of her anger, unforgiveness, and bitterness. She lifted her shattered hopes and broken dreams up to Him. She gave her all to Him, and she trusted Him with her broken heart. She found herself rested and whole when she laid her rejected and abandoned self at the place of her safe haven. She was blind, but now she can see. She sees His love for her...so much more than any human heart could give her. She saw her value and great worth in His eyes. such love...Great Love!
She knew He died for her so that she may live...live in His glorious light. He gently touched her bruised and battered self esteem. He washed with His own tears the shards of glass...the unkind words that others had spoken against her. He washed them away. His words of love penetrated her soul, and she became whole. He held her quietly as she cried each tear of sorrow and pain. He stood with her in the lake of her tears, and he held her and kept her safe. His gaze caught her focus, and she found herself immersed in His love. He clothed her nakedness with His garment of grace. It warmed her soul. All her wretchedness was diminished in the great light of His love. She looked down and He pointed to the lake of tears she had cried: "Look..."He said, "YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!" She saw her reflection on the water, and to her surprise, there was no trace of her torn, bloodied, and worn out garments. Her pain had become a great strength. Her ashes had become His beauty. Her darkness had become His illuminating light. she saw herself as He saw her. She smiled, and leaned in close to His chest. She knew everything was going to be alright. Her heart was home. ~ Jenny Williams, A Modern Day Ruth, Copyright 2015

Monday, March 16, 2015

She Became Whole





She laid her heart's desire on the altar. She poured out her tears and disappointments onto His feet.
She let go of her anger, unforgiveness, and bitterness. She lifted her shattered hopes and broken dreams up to Him.
She gave her all to Him, and she trusted Him with her broken heart. She found herself rested and whole when she laid her rejected and abandoned self at the place of her safe haven. She was blind, but now she can see. She sees His love for her...so much more than... any human heart could give her. She saw her value and great worth in His eyes. such love...Great Love!
She knew He died for her so that she may live...live in His glorious light.
He gently touched her bruised and battered self esteem. He washed with His own tears the shards of glass...the unkind words that others had spoken against her. He washed them away. His words of love penetrated her soul, and she became whole. He held her quietly as she cried each tear of sorrow and pain. He stood with her in the lake of her tears, and he held her and kept her safe. His gaze caught her focus, and she found herself immersed in His love. He clothed her nakedness with His garment of grace. It warmed her soul. All her wretchedness was diminished in the great light of His love. She looked down and He pointed to the lake of tears she had cried: "Look..."He said, "YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!" She saw her reflection on the water, and to her surprise, there was no trace of her torn, bloodied, and worn out garments. Her pain had become a great strength. Her ashes had become His beauty. Her darkness had become His illuminating light. she saw herself as He saw her. She smiled, and leaned in close to His chest. She knew everything was going to be alright. Her heart was home. ~ Jenny Williams, A Modern Day Ruth, Copyright 2015

Thursday, February 12, 2015

From Pain to Blessings



I took a really hot bath to soothe my aching body. Sometimes I feel like I live there, but it has become a favorite place to spend time with Poppa God...singing out love songs and having conversations.

Did you know that you can take that place of pain and turn it into most precious intimate moments with your Heavenly Father? Your place of pain can be a setup for your biggest blessing. We don't always understand why we have to go through heartaches, trials, tears, and struggles, but His love is faithful to meet us there. He is with us. He does not leave us or forsake us. I think, for me, I have more compassion for those who have a broken heart or those who deal with sickness or debilitating pain.

I started this ministry in my most broken of times. My husband had left me to raise our kids on my own. He walked away from God and our marriage. Then, a year later, I was dating a guy who told me everything I longed to hear. A few months later he disappeared with no warning or explanation. I found out a week later he had left me for an old girlfriend. My heart was shattered to pieces. I remember the hours of crying and the tidal waves of emotion that felt impossible to survive. I imagined Him holding my hand, and I knew I had to ride those waves of pain...it was part of the process.

During that time, I remembered the scripture that says:

" When you pass through the waters,
    I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
    they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
    you will not be burned;
    the flames will not set you ablaze." Isaiah 43:2

His hands are not too short to reach down to the place of pain and heartache you are in.

"He reached down from on high and took hold of me; he drew me out of deep waters." Psalms 18:16

Don't feel bad if you shed tears. It doesn't mean you are going backwards -it's part of the healing process. Let His love wrap you and hold you. Cling to Him and He will not let you drown. He is your life preserver. You will overcome this temporary season. You will overcome in Jesus' name. Your testimony is being developed into a love story. One of His love and redeeming grace. Your beauty will come from your ashes, Beloved. ~ Jenny Williams, A Modern Day Ruth, Copyright 2015

Thursday, January 1, 2015

Her standards:



She likes intelligence...Toilet humor just won't impress her.

She is very aware of a heart that's in tune with the Holy Spirit. 

She is attracted to genuine kindness, and a hand of gentleness more than your bank account...and how you steward and handle your money does matter. What do you do with it? What do you invest in? Where does your treasure mainly go?

She's been humbled many times in all that she's had to walk through. She needs you to understand this and to treat her better than her temporary circumstances.

She's intelligent and needs to have inspiring and warm conversation. Talk of what level you made on a video game isn't going to cut it.

She needs you to know she may be kind, gentle and have a child like faith but that don't mean she's not a woman. She is real. She's passionate and sensual too. She just keeps it in check for the one who is worth the wait.

She takes things a bit seriously. She's analytical and could use your humor. Dry, realistic humor makes her laugh. She loves to laugh, she just doesn't know how to get herself there sometimes.

She notices how you treat others: children, the elderly, those in authority, those who serve...She notices.

You take her breath away when you completely and totally abandon pride and worship with all your heart.

She is old fashioned. She's an old soul. She likes to be pursued first. She isn't going to chase you down. She will let you know she likes you, though.

She is a lady and always will be and she won't be treated like anything less.

She cries because the Holy Spirit makes her heart so tender. Her tears don't mean she's weak.

Your age doesn't matter as much as your maturity.

She is a follower by nature. She wants you to lead spiritually. She's wants to follow, not lead.

Her children are her great treasure and blessing...If you can't see or appreciate that too, you are not the one.

She has been misunderstood, labeled, abandoned, broken and used. It took her a long time to find her worth. She won't lower her self worth again for anybody. Be a reminder of who she is in Christ every day. She will honor you for that.

She has a heart for the kingdom, and it's her hobby to serve in His kingdom always. She loves ministry and investing in others for God. It's her favorite. She eats, breathes, and lives to encourage others. She might not see the point of joining a bowling league...Just saying  She wants a man who she can serve with...who has a heart for people.

Her heart isn't easily won. The right one will know how to not give up.

She can't follow a man who has no vision, dreams or aspirations. She can't follow you if you don't follow and listen to the Holy Spirit.

She admires a man who tries and who is sincere. She knows you're human and that you're not perfect. She isn't looking for perfection...She's longing for humbled sincerity.

She longs for your strength, your manhood, your availability to be leaned on. You can be her earthly hero if God is yours.

She wants to hear the music of your heart. It's not how you sing, but why you do that matters. A king David, kind of heart is attractive.

She is a girly girl by nature. She loves to wear dresses and heels and have her nails and toes done. She likes sparkly things. Don't let that make you think she is materialistic, because she's not. She loves people, God, and animals more than things, but she does enjoy a new handbag and shoes once in a while.

She loves taking bubble baths and she hopes to someday have a man who will either join her or read the Bible to her while she takes one.

She doesn't own the key of her heart...Poppa God does. So if you want in, you must know the doorman and get His permission.

Written by Jenny Williams, A Modern Day Ruth Copyright 2014

Boaz, I Prayed for You Tonight



Dear Future Boaz...Tonight, I talked to Poppa God about you.
I heard Him say that you are coming to me soon, but that you were struggling with unworthiness and fears. That you needed to be free from some things. My heart felt saddened at this, because I couldn't even imagine you being unworthy especially if Poppa chose you to be in my life, but I understand even if maybe we have never met...I totally understand. I interceded for you, tonight...that whatever it is you can't seem to let go of, that Poppa God would give you the courage and strength. I prayed for a glance...that somehow my life would inspire you and encourage you to be a godly man, sold out for the Lord. I pray your heart is encouraged tonight...that you feel hope, peace and love in your heart. I pray Poppa God fills you with confidence and that you can see yourself as He does. I pray our hearts are somehow connected even before we have begun as friends or anything else. Just know you have a friend tonight and she is continually praying for you. I pray you look up soon and find me in your field. ~Love always in Christ, Jenny -A Modern Day Ruth

Will He See Me?




At the foot of my bed I knelt and cried, pouring out my sincerest plea...tears running down my face. I could imagine how Ruth felt in her heart and mind -the desperation, fear, questions, and longing as she vulnerably laid herself at Boaz's feet. Her heart was wildly pounding...would he accept her? Would he be willing to love her...this lowly woman with no money, no inheritance but instead a debt of her dead husband's? Would Boaz take her and Naomi in and embrace them? She wasn't even a Hebrew woman, yet she willingly reached out to him and placed herself humbly at his feet. I can imagine tears silently fell. Maybe thoughts raced in her mind: "What will we do if he rejects me?" That's how I feel much of the time: Will I be loved enough by a man who would willingly take me and my kids in and cover us? Love on us? Every man I've ever known before has hurt and disappointed us. Will it be different this time? What if this man can only see my weakness, my pain, my past...my flaws? Can he see past my tired eyes and weak smile? Can he peer over my walls and see to my heart? Being A Modern Day Ruth has been so hard, so humbling, so lonely, so wearisome. Can he see my heart of loyalty and faithfulness to Poppa God? Can he see me as a treasure sent by God...instead of a burden? Boaz was delighted and even felt honored that Ruth laid at his feet. He publicly honored her and celebrated her. ~ A Modern Day Ruth, Jenny Williams 2014